What had been a persistent and gnawing problem in our marriage made itself apparent one morning during school. Kristina was frequently angry with her mother (the teacher) and I was slipping back into a kind of New Age attitude in which I want to kind of offer an incomplete nurturing, a nurturing devoid of discipline. In addition, I was guilty of standing up for Kristina's behavior, rather than showing a unity with Mom and standing up firmly for her. I was aware something was going wrong, I was not aware of all that I was doing. I felt Mom's sense of oppression and called for a meeting with her, separate from Kristina. This is not the easiest thing to do when we live in (and hold school in) our 35 foot RV.

We closed the door to our bedroom in the back, which actually consists of opening the bathroom door, and then we stretched out on the bed. The first thing I asked the teacher was, "Do you want me to leave for a while, so you can be free from my interruptions?"

"Victor, if you want to avoid standing up for me, go ahead and leave for a while. I feel like shutting down school for the day the way she is mouthing so much negativity."

"I don't want to leave, I want to do what God wants me to do. I understand that you want me to completely back you and not try to defend her negative behavior. Is that right?"

"Yes, that is right," she said, looking at me with tear-filled eyes.

"Do you mind if we ask God if I should back off from my 'New Age' attitude of non-discipline?"

"No, go ahead," she said.

I rephrased the statement into a question prayerfully this way: "Dear God, do you want me to let go of my attitude which defends Kristina's behavior, and seems to argue with Mom?" I flipped the coin. It landed on the bed tails, (No), then quickly flipped over to heads (Yes).

I submitted to that aloud. "Darling, God wants me to stop defending Kristina and fully back you…"

She broke down in joyful tears and hugged me. I, too, had eyes that filled with joyous tears. Within, I prayed that the Lord would help me fully back Mom at all times as she worked with Kristina's education and behavior.

Without having a conference with Kristina, class resumed. The new attitude of Mom and Dad (teacher and principal), was already in the classroom and, interestingly, no disciplinary action was required for Kristina. She remarkably, became compliant and teachable on her own, after our meeting in which we called on God for instruction as to what I needed to do.

What an awesome God we have. He CAN speak to us in this way of prayerfully flipping a coin. He wants us to use this whenever we have dissension growing within us. He wants both parties to agree that God can (and does) speak to us in this way. He knows that when two parties agree that they will abide by God's ruling, and they prayerfully seek God's ruling, that many arguments will cease and much more harmony will ensue. See Proverbs 18:18:

To cast lots puts an end to disputes and decides between powerful contenders. (AMP)